First weigh in of the year. I dug my scale out of the closet and nearly had a heart attack....
I knew it was going to be bad. I ate everything in sight over the holidays and was too stressed out to care. Or atleast, that's what I told myself. Ironically, the things causing me stress are still here for me to overcome! The freedom I thought I was feeling over eating whatever I felt like has caused me to feel like a prisoner in my own clothes. I'm uncomfortable and it's not fun seeing muffin top again. Then I realized that I am only 25 lbs away from my heaviest weight ever. I think I stopped breathing for a moment as I thought about THAT girl and that I'm creeping back to her.
But that was the proverbial icy cold bucket of water that I needed dumped on me. I hid the scale in the closet because if it was out, I would step on it, and I did not want to face the consequences of my choices. Well the scale is out for good. I need to take my measurements and a photo this weekend as well to completely capture my starting point.
I can honestly say that even though I feel like a busted can of biscuits, I have not resorted to calling myself fat or any other negative adjective. Im a little upset that I let myself go, shocked from reality hitting me in the face, but trying to let this lesson sink in.
Eating doesn't solve anything, period.
But on the bright side, it has been a pretty good week. I've worked out, made better food choices, and my body is SORE. The weight will come off, but I gotta take it one day at a time and make these habits as natural as breathing. And you can't track progress if you don't know where you are starting. Today was a necessary evil, but I promise you, I never will see 252 again.
No comments:
Post a Comment